Daily Devotional: Getting Over My Self
- David A. Case
- Jul 6
- 3 min read
By David A. Case
“Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.” (Philippians 2:4, NKJV)
The most practical step toward the one another lifestyle is healthy communication. At the human level, connection happens mostly through communication. We speak with words, but we also communicate through tone, facial expression, body language, timing, silence, and even the spiritual flow we carry. We are continually sending messages and receiving messages. The problem is that the sender and the receiver are often not on the same page.
When that happens, negative spiritual flows are common. Rejection rises. A critical spirit enters. Pride gets defensive. The other person feels unheard, belittled, managed, or dismissed. Words may continue, but real communication has stopped.
One of the most important prerequisites for healthy communication is humility. We have to know that we don’t know. That sounds simple, but ego resists it. Most of us judge situations according to our current spiritual flow and according to what is normal for us. If anger feels normal, we may call harshness honesty. If fear feels normal, we may call caution wisdom. If control feels normal, we may call dominance leadership. If withdrawal feels normal, we may call distance peace.
To truly hear another person, I have to get over me. I have to get over my assumptions, my need to be right, my instinctive interpretations, and my desire to move the conversation toward my preferred outcome. That is hard work. Seeing and hearing the hearts of others requires humility, patience, and love.
For some people, the starting point is simply caring enough to do the work. Many only communicate to the degree needed to get a selfish benefit. They ask enough to get what they want. They listen enough to respond. They engage enough to control the outcome. That is not love. Seeing and hearing the heart of another person is one of the foundations of loving others.
There is a kind of “knowing” that shuts down communication. We may size someone up quickly and assume we already understand. Even if our perception is partly accurate, that assumption can stop us from listening. When we stop hearing, the other person often feels rejected or manipulated. The relationship lacks the godly connection needed to bring life. Communication is done, even if words continue.
Good communication begins when I believe I truly need others. Ephesians 4 teaches that the body grows as each part does its work. That means other people have something to give me. Their perspective matters. Their experience matters. Their pain matters. Their contribution matters. If I do not value others, I will communicate like a child, tossed around by ego, emotion, and assumption.
When I finally get over me, I can hear God and others. Healthy communication begins there. Not with technique. Not with perfect words. It begins with humility that says, “I may not understand yet. I need to listen.”
Reflection Question
Where do I tend to assume I already understand someone before I have truly listened?
Prayer
Father, help me get over myself so I can hear You and others. Expose the assumptions and ego reactions that keep me from listening well. Teach me to value people enough to slow down, ask, listen, and understand. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Obedience Step for Today
In your next meaningful conversation, pause before giving advice or responding. Ask one sincere follow-up question that helps you understand the other person more fully.
This devotional was inspired by the book Heart Change Handbook by David A. Case. If you found it helpful, please consider it for your own self-study and suggest it to your church small group or recovery community as a basis for small group study.
If this message has encouraged you to pursue deeper transformation, I invite you to continue the journey through The Heart Change Handbook. It provides a practical, biblical path for spiritual growth and is an excellent resource for church small groups and recovery communities. Consider getting your copy today and introducing it to your group as a guide toward meaningful heart change.
👉 Learn more about Small Group Resources from Heart Change U.
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