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Overcoming Perfectionism

Should Christians Judge Others Heart Change U Live

 

I am a perfectionist. I am very good at picking myself apart. I am good at self hatred. But the better I get at my perfectionism, the more I fail.


It seems like the right thing to do. How else are we going to keep control of ourselves? We have to give ourselves a good “beating” now and then, or we will get “the big head.”


I might be in favor of it if actually beating myself up resulted in any positive change. The problem is that this kind of “self-control” doesn’t work. In fact, if anything, the self-hatred makes the problem worse.


The solution does not lie in a self-proclaimed "I am awesome." Sure, the “positive thinker” may feel good about self for a season. But once the first defeat comes, a greater crash is soon to follow.


The solution to self-hatred is “I am.” Every single human being is fearfully and wonderfully made (Ps. 139:14). We all have something at the deeper spiritual level to contribute to others. “I am.” Period. 


It is not my job to shake the universe but to be who “I am.” When that is not enough, it is ok. I don’t need to stress or strive. I rest in my limitations. When I do that, I bring peace to the situation. When I bring peace, things start working better in my sphere. If I can accept my “I am” and rest in it, so many things change for the good.

 

I am overcoming perfectionism. I am learning to let go of my perfectionism and rest. When there is conflict or pain, one of the best things I can do is to do nothing. It is to take a deep breath and rest in my “I am.” I accept my limited influence. I accept that others will not always react well to me, and that doesn’t necessarily mean I am a failure.


When things start working better, I feel better about myself. I haven’t done anything except rest in my “I am.” It really is a much better life, and I have a much better impact on others too!


Take your place in the world God has given you. You and God make a powerful team. With Him on board, you possess good stuff. You bring good stuff—the kind of stuff that makes it easier to rest in your “I am.” How can it get any better than resting in your “I am”? 


Ready to Overcome Perfectionism?

Take the first step in discovering your "I am" with our online spiritual gifts quiz:



Overcoming Perfectionism by discovering your spiritual gifts quiz online



Heart Change U offers has a whole toolkit to encourage and support you in the walk toward Heart Change. Check it out:







 

HeartChangeU tools for Small Groups & Church Leaders

Heart Change U is an online training platform for Christian counselors, church elders, pastors, and those who seek to help influence others in healing and growing in His image. Developed through more than 15 years of helping addicts and alcoholics heal at a spiritual level from the wounds that cause their addictions, these proven tools and approaches are intended to equip you to walk with others through the Heart Change process in order to become the men and women of God He is calling them to be.


 

The Omega Project: Faith Based Residential Recovery Program


The Omega Project Christian addiction recovery program offers a community of discipleship homes where assistance is always available to help fight through the challenges of dysfunction so that men and women may find and be restored to their created purpose.

If you or someone you love is caught in the stronghold of addiction, there is hope in Christ! Reach out to The Omega Project.


 

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1 Comment


Thanks for a great read. This, in particular, stuck out to me: "It is not my job to shake the universe but to be who “I am.” When that is not enough, it is ok. I don’t need to stress or strive. I rest in my limitations." That's difficult to do, between pride on one hand and people-pleasing on the other! This was a great reminder.

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